A friend of mine, with whom I communicate via e-mail every week, bought a production chopper out of a dealer showroom the other day. I am not saying what brand it is for no other reason than it doesn't matter, but he never said a word to me about wanting a new bike before telling me he bought it. Funny thing is, I knew he had been going around and around about modifications on his Softail Standard and how he could give it the look he was after, but he never turned bolt one on the project, so the new purchase floored me.
Why did it floor me? Well, not because it was a chopper, and certainly not because it was store bought. Readers of this page know I believe in production choppers simply because not everyone has the time or knowledge to build one - but enough on that, we can debate it in another editorial. No, it floored me because he was hung up on how to make his Softail an all-purpose bike, one that would look good, do touring duty, and even strip down to a basic street racer - a tall order for any motorcycle, let alone a chopper.
I called my friend to get the details of his purchase and pick his brain as to the motivation behind it. Say what you will, but a chopper with a 240 or 250 rear tire and some 10-inch-over forks is not what the average person builds as an all-purpose bike. After a few minutes of catching up on family and friends, I spun the dialogue around to the bike and asked what happened to his all-around creation. The answer he offered floored me more than his actual purchase - in a real and honest moment, my friend admitted he was a poser.
He dominated the conversation for about 10 minutes, as he dumped out all the rationale behind his purchase. It started with economics. He took out a piece of paper and put the purchase price of the Standard up top. Then, he added the cost of the hop-up parts he wanted, followed by the labor to get them installed and tuned. Then, he made a generalization about what he thought some sheetmetal work and paint would be, and slid that into the column. The final element in his mathematical equation was another generalization related to the cost of a quick-detach windshield and saddlebags. When he added it all up, the cost of his bike had more than doubled. But that wasn't the deciding factor.
No, common sense kicked in and he realized that no matter how much he put into turning the Standard into an all-purpose bike, it wouldn't excel at anything, it would just be pretty good at a few things. He knew, at the bottom of his heart, he wanted a bike that grabbed people's attention and twisted their necks as he went by. See, he was honest enough to analyze his riding habits, and he accepted the fact that even if he did all that stuff to his Standard, he wouldn't actually tour on it, nor race it. His needs were pretty basic, a bike that could handle a few hundred miles on a weekend or do the to-work-traffic-boogie, and still grab all the attention there is to grab.
With peace of mind at hand and a real understanding of what he wanted, he rolled into a shop and made a deal to trade in his Standard for the bike of his dreams: A fat-tire, semi-radical production chopper. Sure, he still needed to do a few things to it in order to make it completely his, but on his first ride around the town, he knew he made the right choice. Not only did the bike garner all the attention he had always dreamed of, it fit him perfectly. He was more comfortable on his new Chopper than his old bike, and that meant he would be able to ride longer distances.
When I walked in the office this morning, I had an email waiting from my friend. He wants to know if I can suggest a good detachable windshield and saddlebags for his new bike. Who would have thought he would put together an all-purpose chopper?