Big money will always try to muscle the smaller shops into doing something the shop wouldn't normally do. The shop can easily perform the task, but sometimes the work doesn't agree with what the shop originally set out to do. For example, Count's Kustoms out of Las Vegas was recently offered a pile of cash to build a theme bike for a golf company. Apparently, the golf company had some show lined up on the Discovery Channel and wanted to milk their media exposure with a bike built from the crap they produce. Count's Kustoms owner, Dan, declined the offer, citing the fact that a golf theme bike didn't fit with the image they were trying to portray in the industry - the golf company representative went ape-shit and started crying like a baby when he realized that Dan had no intention of budging on the issue. When the show actually aired they bashed Count's on national TV and continued to harass Dan over a series of emails. Which leads me to this letter written by Jim Houck, one of STREET CHOPPER's freelancers, who wrote a letter to the golf company in Count's Kustoms defense. Check it out. - Greg
Soiled swine, indeed, low you are laid. What made you think your grubby millions would impress anybody in the biker world? Money doesn't make the leather fade, get you through the ice and bar fights, money doesn't replace six-digit odometer readings, money doesn't buy character or loyalty or honor or brotherhood or pride and apparently you've never been to Count's. He's got money. And it's not what makes him significant. It's not what makes him a biker or an American.
Our bros who live in trailers are worth 10-to-one of your corporate-boot-licking poltroon sisters in any situation easy or hard. Any knothead low-brow enough to get excited about the symbol of valuation, rather than that which the symbol of valuation represents is truly daft, a bolt-on dullard, destined for a mean extinction via a dark ride down the Darwin track. I bet if 10 of my trailer-living bros were standing in your office, you'd have all sorts of nice things to say about them.
The motorcycle world was around decades before Hollywood TV execs slithered in to make a profit off the American pride and individuality our world lives and dies by and it'll be around long after the Discovery Channel Patch fades into deserved oblivion.
Count and his crew build original outlaw chops that border on artwork for men who appreciate the motorcycle, the craftsmanship, the ride, what Count stands for, not some phony image they think it'll give them because they're aren't man enough to build an image themselves through their ability to be great at something. You wave Tiger's name around like a $50 bill at a tit club, but nobody's dancing. Woods I respect, he's damned good at what he does. He's humble, respectful. You, what are you good at? I can't tell from your whining. I never hear Woods whine, even when he loses.
The man makes the chop, not vice versa. Just ask Count. They build it they way they see it. But you wouldn't understand that principle because you're trying to buy your way into a world that requires integrity. You're in over your head, Pres. Go sweat the gross rating points and cost per million before you get a fingernail chipped.
You're pissed off because you heard the word "no." Your dink corporate money didn't buy you through the door like you're used to it doing and you can't believe it, you're baffled, horrified, worried, you've got cool jelly between your legs, you've been made keenly aware that cash alone doesn't cut it in this world and cash is all you got, swinger. Welcome to a world where character is the currency and change is paid in respect. You're broke on this planet.
You'll dismiss everything I say as ignorant banter, rubbish, something that doesn't compute and won't pass legal. If you had the sack to take it to heart, it'd make you a better man. You and your yes-men crowd around the water cooler and burp up the latest round of comp bagels and bitch about the latest corporate review where you voluntarily let some feathery corporate whore diddle you over your inability to hit the latest sales projections. Your facetious remarks and shrill sarcasm only serve to highlight your milling, crazed frustration. Tell every person who watches your channel what a bunch of moronic, buck-toothed cousin-fuckers we bikers are. Tell 'em we ALL live in trailers. Tell them what idiotic businessmen we are, how Count recklessly turned down your esteemed dough and later died because of it from shame. Anything to keep swine like you off my fuckin' highways. You get in my way, your trailers interfere with my view.
I strongly support Count's decision to turn you down. If I'd heard he built a golfing-themed motorcycle, rather than what he believes in, I would have ridden to Las Vegas and puked on his doorstep personally.
Motorcycles are about individuality, not selling out. The fact that you missed the entire point of what a motorcycle is for is what sickens me most. Get out and put 500,000 miles on a scoot, and you'll realize what a jackass you sound like to men who have. You don't have the salt. Go home. Saddle up the Benz and head to the nearest salon, get your hair done. You'll feel better and they'll cut it anyway you want it.-Jim Houck